My pronouns are:
Example usage in sentences:
- I think they are very nice.
- I met them recently.
- Is this their dog?
- They told me that the house is theirs.
- They said they would rather do it themselves.
Table:
Subject | Object | Possessive determiner | Possessive pronoun | Reflexive |
---|---|---|---|---|
they | them | their | theirs | themselves |
Examples from cultural texts:
Singular “they” (they/them)
ALOK – Bio on personal website, 2017
- “ALOK (they/them) is a gender non-conforming writer and performance artist. Their distinctive style and poetic challenge to the gender binary have been internationally renowned. As a mixed-media artist Alok uses poetry, prose, comedy, performance, fashion design, and portraiture to explore themes of gender, race, trauma, belonging, and the human condition. They are the author of Femme in Public (2017) and Beyond the Gender Binary (2020). In 2019 they were honored as one of NBC’s Pride 50 and Out Magazine’s OUT 100. They have presented their work in more than 40 countries.”
Blizzard Entertainment – Meet the Mercenaries – Varden Dawngrasp (a new character in the game Hearthstone) , 2021
- “A curious intellectual seeking redemption in the eyes of their people…
Dawngrasp spent most of their life in Silvermoon, a curious young elf and student of all things magical. They showed a preternatural gift for the arcane, quickly mastering various schools of magical thought. They were trained by Prince Kael’thas Sunstrider himself, who was part of the High Council of the Kirin Tor. It looked like Dawngrasp would rise through the ranks of the mages of Quel’thalas and attain the title of Magister.
Alas, Arthas and the Scourge had other plans. In the aftermath of the destruction of the Sunwell, Kael’thas went to Outland, but Dawngrasp would not go. After the prince’s subsequent betrayal, many of the magisters, Grand Magister Rommath included, suspected that Dawngrasp might be in league with the traitorous prince. Alienated, Dawngrasp turned to their studies for comfort.
After the Night of Falling Stars, a troll appeared in Silvermoon. His name was Kazakus, and he sought aid in gathering the glowing shards that had rained across the Barrens. Suspicious of the troll’s intentions, Dawngrasp went to Kalimdor of their own accord, seeking knowledge about the power contained inside the shards…”
- “A curious intellectual seeking redemption in the eyes of their people…
Hisashi Nogami – Splatoon (Agent 3), 2015 ; Agent 3, a character starring in all 3 games, is canonically non-binary / has no gender, as the player is able to decide that for themselves.
Mobius Digital – Outer Wilds, 2019 ; The hearthians do not have a concept of gender and exclusively refer to each other with they/them pronouns
softbuns7 – Honkai: Star Rail - Pom-Pom, 2023
- “Mission Description of "Sudden Sadness":
Pom-Pom seems to be troubled and depressed. Find something to distract them and brighten up their day.” - “"If a glass gets broken... Pom-Pom will certainly have a wonderful reaction to it, won't they?" - Inner monologue of the Trailblazer during investigation in the adventure mission "Sudden Sadness"”
- “Mission Description of "Battle for Health":
Pom-Pom is starting physical training, but they require your help to practice...
Steps:
1. Find Pom-Pom and play ball with them
” - “"This is Pom-Pom's most prized plant. They'll notice even if one leaf is ever-so-slightly darker." - Inner monologue of the Trailblazer during investigation in the adventure mission "Sudden Sadness"”
- “Mission Description of "Sudden Sadness":
Toby Fox – Deltarune, 2018 ; Kris Dreemurr is a confirmed non-binary character from the indie RPG "Deltarune"
Tillie Walden – On a Sunbeam, 2016
- “Oh and Ell doesn't talk. No one told me that when I got here and I felt like an idiot. And they're non-binary.”
William Shakespeare – The Comedy of Terrors (Act 4, Scene 3) , 1595
- “There's not a man I meet but doth salute me
As if I were their well-acquainted friend”
- “There's not a man I meet but doth salute me
Wizards of the Coast – Magic: The Gathering, 2020
- “Niko is a new Planeswalker from the Plane of Theros. Early in Niko's life, an oracle foresaw a great future for Niko: they were destined to be a great athlete, an undefeated javelineer who would never miss a shot. Niko trained and competed for many years, but in all that time, they heard stories and songs of heroes who would fight to protect people and began to question the destiny prescribed to them. Eventually, Niko decided to challenge fate itself and, to the shock of many, purposefully lost a competition. The realization that they could control their own fate set Niko on their new path: a young Planeswalker seeking to become a true hero like they had always dreamed.”
Battlefield 2042, 2021
- “Sundance definitely likes to live on the edge. They're a skilled and fearless adversary that's had two very different lives – one as a model soldier in the Armée de Terre, and an earlier and much darker existence as a trusted associate in a major Parisian crime syndicate. The latter, sadly, came back to haunt them and ended their military career pre-maturely.”
- “This Assault Specialist is doing their best to keep a low profile among the Non-Patriated, while still using their unique talents to aid the cause whenever they can.”
Bloodhound – Apex Legends, 2021
- “Bloodhound is known across the Outlands as one of the greatest game hunters the Frontier has ever seen. The child of two engineers stationed at the New Dawn industrial plant on Talos, Bloodhound was taken in by their uncle Artur after a meltdown destroyed the facility and killed both their parents. Artur taught them the Old Ways, a belief system that focuses on the glory of nature and rejects modern technology. Yet Bloodhound was constantly drawn to technological marvels, and ultimately used both new and old methods to take down a Goliath that preyed on the people of their village, forever changing their life’s path.”
Bugsnax, 2020
- “Dislikes journalists for painting them as creepy.”
- “Shelda stroked Lizbert's distrust of Floofty, and they fled.”
Fallout 76: Steel Dawn, 2020
- “Because it suits them better. When I first met Burke... they were different. Secluded. Like they didn't want anyone to see them. Burke flinched when others talked about them. People expected things based on how they looked. They had these... titles. The Silent Man. Albino Dog. One day I asked if something else would feel better. It took some trial and error, but we eventually settled on the neutral 'they'. They're a much happier person now, for the insignificant price of a word.”
Shalaxi Helbane (Warhammer minature, Games Workshop) , 2019
- “Shalaxi Helbane is a monster hunter without compare. Just as fast, lethal and magically adept as a regular Keeper of Secrets, this champion of the Dark Prince has a suite of skills that make them a deadly duellist in both Warhammer 40,000 and Warhammer Age of Sigmar. Bloodthirsters, Hive Tyrants and Stardrakes alike will struggle to face their wrath, making them a superb addition to your Slaanesh or Chaos Daemons army.”
Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six Siege: Operation Vector Glare, 2022
- “Growing up in a tight-knit family unit, Ngoma was able to pursue their interests without much resistance. They learned everything they could about psychology and physics, all the while receiving classical music training with their two younger siblings. Ngoma also learned the basics of mechanics in their father’s garage, effectively rounding out the skillset that they would later apply in their career.”
Treble from Papa's Cluckeria uses they/them (taken from the wiki) ,
- “"They are the first character to appear in a Flipline Studios game to identify as a gender other than male or female."
"Hailing from the quaint town of Oilseed Springs, Treble is a diligent High School student and an enthusiastic member of the school’s Auto Club. Treble’s life took an exciting turn on their 16th birthday when their father handed over the keys to his old pickup truck. During the following winter, Treble spent countless hours in the garage, revamping the old truck with new parts and their own personal flair. Now, nothing brings them more joy than cruising down the dusty roads of Oilseed Springs on a sweltering summer day."”
- “"They are the first character to appear in a Flipline Studios game to identify as a gender other than male or female."
Dana Terrace – The Owl House (Season 2, Episode 7) , 2021 ; Raine Whispers is the first non-binary character of Disney and they're voiced by the also non-binary voice artist, Avi Roque
- “"So the Head Witch of the Bard Coven likes pretending to be a rebel. Too bad they're not very good at it!"”
Dana Terrace – The Owl House (Season 2, Episode 8) , 2021 ; Raine Whispers is the first non-binary character of Disney and they're voiced by the also non-binary voice artist, Avi Roque
Eric Kripke – Gen V, 2023 ; Jordan Li is the main character of the series “Gen V”; they are a bigender person. Two actors appear in this role: London Thor and Derek Luh.
Hamish Steele – Dead End - Paramormal Parl, 2022
- “"[...]Anway, hello, I'm Jules.
My pronouns are they, them, and the late.
[laughs] A little, uh, ghost jokes for you there."”
- “"[...]Anway, hello, I'm Jules.
Matt Braly – Amphibia, ; Darcy is referred to with a variety of pronouns, including it/its and they/them.
Billions (Season 2, Episode 2) , 2017
- “Hello, I'm Taylor. My pronouns are they, theirs, and them.”
- “– She spotted that from outer space?
– Not she. They.”
Blockbuster (S01 E05) , 2022
- “Left, left, left. I hate Quinn. I don't even know if they like movies. They come in here all the time and make everything about themselves.”
- “[...] and Quinn, who never stops talking about themself, no offense.”
DeGrassi: Next Class (Season 4, Episode 6 “#FactsOnly”) , 2017
- “My favorite vlogger did a thing about this. They identify as genderqueer. Or, I think there’s another name for it. Um... Genderfluid. They feel like they’re between a boy or a girl. Or both. Or neither.”
New Amsterdam (season 6, episode 6) , 2019
No Way uses they/them (Object Show: IT'S TIME FOR THE) ,
- “Taken from the wiki
"They competed on Earth at first, but they were temporarily switched to Scribble."
"Despite their levelheaded and rational nature, they are shown to be easily surprised such as when they asked Tile where he went, and when Tile responded with, "you just don't get it dude" they exclaimed in happiness in Best Source For Weather Information."”
- “Taken from the wiki
She-Ra and the Princesses of Power, 2019
- “Lord Hordak, I’d like to introduce you to Double Trouble. They’re our newest asset in taking down the Rebellion. (Season 4, Episode 3)”
- “We captured Double Trouble! They’re refusing to talk to us, but... still! (Season 4, Episode 8)”
Star Trek: Strange New Worlds (Season 1 Episode 7, "The Serene Squall") , 2022
Avinash Chak – Beyond 'he' and 'she': The rise of non-binary pronouns (BBC News) , 2015
- “kat baus, a non-binary student who graduated from Harvard this year - and who also writes their name without capital letters - regrets that the university's computer system was not introduced earlier. "It would have been a lot easier and less awkward," baus says.
baus sent emails or visited professors during office hours to explain their gender identity and pronouns. In smaller classes they (baus) brought it up when introducing themself.”
- “kat baus, a non-binary student who graduated from Harvard this year - and who also writes their name without capital letters - regrets that the university's computer system was not introduced earlier. "It would have been a lot easier and less awkward," baus says.
Jamie Feldman – How Being The First Non-Binary Person Vying For Miss Colorado USA Changed Their Life (HuffPost) , 2019
- “Their friends and family were wary but supportive ― so much so that Stecina quickly collected enough money to cover the application fee through fundraising on social media ― and after publicly announcing their intention to compete, they found themself in a particularly vulnerable place.”
Alison Flood – Marieke Lucas Rijneveld wins International Booker for The Discomfort of Evening (The Guardian) , 2020
- “In their acceptance speech, Rijneveld said they wrote the words “be relentless” on the wall above their desk while writing their novel.
“Today, when the world has been turned upside down and is showing its dark side, I often remember those words. So, write, read, win, lose, love each other, but be relentless in this,” they said.”
- “In their acceptance speech, Rijneveld said they wrote the words “be relentless” on the wall above their desk while writing their novel.
Ben Kesslen – Nonbinary 'Billions' star Asia Kate Dillon won't be 'made precious' (NBC News) , 2019
- “As Dillon explains it, when they started as a recurring character in Season 2, Taylor was ”sort of introduced as this moral and ethical center in a very unethical world.” A young, queer and nonbinary person entering the male-dominated hedge fund world, their character acted as an antidote to the hedge fund’s money-hungry male employees. But, as Dillon said, power and money “corrupt” and their character wasn’t immune.”
Mordechai Laub – Kacen Callender shares the importance of queer novels (Young Entertainment) , 2020
- “Kacen Callender is a bestselling and award-winning author. They have written novels for middle school readers, young adult readers, and adults. Kacen Callender born and raised in St. Thomas of the US Virgin Islands. Some of Kacen Callender’s novels include This Is Kind of an Epic Love Story and Felix Ever After. ”
Nick Romano – Madagascar animated series welcomes a nonbinary character in Pride episode sneak peek (Entertainment Weekly) , 2021
- “Ezra Menas couldn't identify with a character on screen until hir mid-20s. The actor from Broadway's Jagged Little Pill and the upcoming West Side Story movie — who identifies as nonbinary and uses zie/hir/they pronouns — saw actor Elliot Fletcher, a trans man, portray Aaron on an episode of The Fosters. It was "real, real late in my life," Menas tells EW. Before that moment, zie would project hir experience onto characters "always hoping for some kind of narrative to come through."”
- “Thinking back to how little queer representation Menas saw on screen as a kid, they believe a character like Odee would've made hir younger self feel less alone.”
Alexis Petridis – Sam Smith: Love Goes review – heartbreak album plays it safe in hard times (The Guardian) , 2020
- “The lyrics stick fast to romantic misery, from infidelity to perfidious swine interested only in Smith’s bank balance. These are perennial topics for Smith, though as they told Lowe, their first two albums were inspired by unrequited love; Love Goes is apparently their “first proper heartbreak album”. ”
R. B. Lemberg (Uncanny Magazine) , 2019
- “R.B. Lemberg is a queer, bigender immigrant from Ukraine, Russia, and Israel to the US. Their stories and poems have appeared in Lightspeed‘s Queers Destroy Science Fiction, Beneath Ceaseless Skies, Uncanny Magazine, Sisters of the Revolution: A Feminist Speculative Fiction Anthology, and more.”
Star Trek: Discovery Introduces First Transgender and Non-Binary Characters (StarTrek.com) , 2020
- “Del Barrio was in their final year of studies at the London Academy of Music and Dramatic Art when they auditioned for the role of Adira. Del Barrio has been acting in theater and short films since the age of 7, and they’re incredibly excited to make their television acting debut in season three of Discovery.”
Top 7 LGBTQ moments of the Tokyo Olympics (Outsports) , 2021
- “Quinn (who is trans nonbinary) had a Games to remember when they helped Canada win its first gold medal in women’s soccer. Quinn always remembered they represented more than themself, as they said on the “Trans Sporter Room” podcast last year […]”
Alechia Dow – The Sound of Stars, 2020
- “AvR0la has been [M0Rr1S’s] personal assistant and companion since youth. They are nonbinary, efficient and far more sensible than he. Their pale blonde hair is pulled back into a severe bun, and their green eyes shimmer in the reflection they cast in the window.”
Alechia Dow – The Sound of Stars, 2020
- “They open the door and give me a small grin. Their name’s Angel, an enby from the ninth floor. They’re maybe three years older than me, blond, skinny as a rail, with blue eyes that dart back and forth like they’re expecting something, but it might just be their normal expression. I follow them down the dark hall to the former laundry room[...]”
Charlie Jane Andrews – The Bookstore at the End of America (short story from the collection A People's Future of the United States) , 2019
- “Sander stared at the space where Souls on the Land ought to be, and their pale, round face was full of lines. They had a single tattoo of a butterfly clad in gleaming armor, and the wires rained from the shaved back of their skull. They were some kind of engineer for the Anoth Complex.”
Daniel José Older – Midnight Horizon (Star Wars: The High Republic) , 2022 ; The High Republic is a multimedia series, the photo seen is from "Galactic Bake-Off Spetacular" which features Kantam Sy and their friend Torban Buck telling a story. Both characters are in both books and comics.
- ““That’s what I thought,” Kantam said. They raced ahead to smack back the next few shots, taking care to adjust their balance for the weight of each one. With the gunship bearing down on them, Kantam sent the final laser blast zinging directly into it, taking out the cannon and gunner in a sparkling explosion.
Kantam sidestepped and held out their lightsaber as the gunship hurtled past, shredding a vicious gash into its metal armor.”
- ““That’s what I thought,” Kantam said. They raced ahead to smack back the next few shots, taking care to adjust their balance for the weight of each one. With the gunship bearing down on them, Kantam sent the final laser blast zinging directly into it, taking out the cannon and gunner in a sparkling explosion.
Bernardine Evaristo – Girl, Woman, Other, 2019
- “they were asked to review the play for a fee for the lifestyle magazine, Rogue Nation, on account of their Twitter following of over a million followers
which apparently turned them into an ‘influencer'” - “fancy me bumping into Mx Morgan Malinga! how cool is that? all the way down from oooop North, wey aye, man, I bet you love being in London, are you going to move down?”
- “they were asked to review the play for a fee for the lifestyle magazine, Rogue Nation, on account of their Twitter following of over a million followers
Jorge Luis Borges – The Garden of Forking Paths (Original title: El jardín de senderos que se bifurcan" (1941)) , 1948
- “He was Governor of Yunnan and gave up temporal power to write a novel with more characters than there are in the Hung Lou Meng, and to create a maze in which all men would lose themselves. ”
Yoon Ha Lee – Phoenix Extravagant, 2020
- “What did you expect? they asked themself. They'd known about Vei's loyalties from the beginning, even if she had Hwagugin blood. Being intimate with Jebi didn't change her nature. But they couldn't help wishing it were otherwise.”
Linsey Miller – Mask of Shadows, 2017 ; a genderfluid character who goes by he, she or they depending on what they’re wearing
Daniel José Older – Star Wars: Last Shot, 2018
- “Now Taka was yelling something, singing, perhaps, in tune with the melodious love song that the world itself sang. They were insistent, there was somewhere apparently they wanted to be, and wanted Han to be, too, which was lovely.”
Kelly Robson – Intervention (in Infinity’s End, edited by Jonathan Strahan) , 2018
- “Émeraude unclipped and offered the doctor their hand. They were a kid with only two modes: all-out or flatline. A few months back, they’d injured themselves cranking on a crimp, completely bowstringing the flexor tendon.”
William Shakespeare – The Comedy of Errors (Act IV, Scene III) , 1594 ; Early use of (generic) singular they/them.
- “There's not a man I meet but doth salute me
As if I were their well-acquainted friend”
- “There's not a man I meet but doth salute me
Sheela Chari – The Unexplainable Disappearance Of Mars Patel (JP McGowan, a non-binary character which is canon in the books but not in the podcast ) , 2019
- “JP had a fight with their mom this morning and wonders if they'll ever be accepted in this world'.”
Tui. T. Sutherland – Wings of Fire; Flames of hope (Chapter 7, page 88) , 2022
- “"Is it a boy human, or a girl human?" Sky would ask.
"Neither? Both? We'd have to ask them," Wren said. "They use they and them pronoun. Like that traveling librarian we met, Sky, remember? Sage?"
"Oh, Right," Sky said”
- “"Is it a boy human, or a girl human?" Sky would ask.
William of Palerne – William and the Werewolf, 1375 ; The earliest known example of generic singular "they" usage
- “Hastely hiȝed eche wiȝt ... til þei neyȝþed so neiȝh ... þere william & his worþi lef were liand i-fere.
(Moder English: Each man hurried ... til they drew near ... where William and his darling were lying together.)”
- “Hastely hiȝed eche wiȝt ... til þei neyȝþed so neiȝh ... þere william & his worþi lef were liand i-fere.
Rowan Williams – The Face in Her Stars (a League of Legends short story) , 2021
- “I rushed Shorin with a cry. They raised their shield defensively, but I lifted my own and then drove it down, using their front-heavy weight to topple them. In a flash, my sword was over my shield, pointed at their throat. They lifted their sword to the side to show the stroke would have felled them.”
Virginia Woolf – Orlando: A Biography, 1928 ; The titular character of Woolf's novel mysteriously changes from a man into a woman at the age of 30 and lives for over 300 years without aging. Singular they is used in the passage describing Orlando's “transformation”.
- “We may take advantage of this pause in the narrative to make certain statements. Orlando had become a woman--there is no denying it. But in every other respect, Orlando remained precisely as he had been. The change of sex, though it altered their future, did nothing whatever to alter their identity. Their faces remained, as their portraits prove, practically the same. His memory--but in future we must, for convention's sake, say 'her' for 'his,' and 'she' for 'he'--her memory then, went back through all the events of her past life without encountering any obstacle.”
The Holy Bible, King James Version. Deutronomy 17:5, 1611 ; Early use of (generic) singular they/them.
- “Then shalt thou bring forth that man, or that woman (which haue committed that wicked thing) vnto thy gates, euen that man, or that woman, and shalt stone them with stones till they die.”
atlas, jhfly – they/them (from the EP “flowers”) , 2018
Sam Domingo – It’s as if my ears want to close, 2020 ; The poem was part of a performative lecture “When words erase people. Experiences of non-binary people in Poland and the Philippines”
- “A certain softness is in their voice,
Almost whispering constant aggression.
They tell me the slurs, now notes,
have formed a harmonious hum of
The melancholy of the linguistic conundrum.
They sing to me an elegy for their dead name.
It's as if my ears want to close.
They smoke for a breather,
Mimicking the gasps from sudden attacks
Of "tita," [aunt] "ate," [sister] and "ma'am"
Invoked from homophobic lungs
That gave claustrophobic traumas.
I gulp the air now a pound heavier.
It's as if their ears want to close.”
- “A certain softness is in their voice,
Bandetto uses they/them (LAPFOX TRAX/HALLEY LABS) , ; Bandetto is canonically agender and dating The Quick Brown Fox (making them an agender4agender couple)
- “From Bandetto's biography: "a pool toy that was animated through unknown means - like, actually unknown. they aren't one of Darius' weird experiments and were invited to HALLEY LABS by Rotteen. they can't speak or use sign language due to their paws, but their gesturing is always very easy to read. they have a strong fondness for TQBF."”
Normative “he/him” (he/him)
Eiichiro Oda – Nami shows her Loyalty to the Crew!, 2021
Scott Cawthon – Five Nights at Freddy's 2, 2014
- “In the game Five Nights at Freddy's 2, the character Mangle, also referred to as "The Mangle," canonically uses she/him pronouns. In Phone Guy's call on the third night, he says "I think the employees refer to him as just 'The Mangle. '" ”
- “Additionally, part of his description in Five Nights at Freddy's: Ultimate Custom Night, part of her description says "...once Mangle reaches the vent opening he will never leave. Use the vent-snare to prevent her from making it that far."”
- “When the creator of the game, Scott Cawthon, was asked about Mangle's gender, he says that her gender is "Yes."”
Eric Kripke – Gen V, 2023 ; Jordan Li is the main character of the series “Gen V”; they are a bigender person. Two actors appear in this role: London Thor and Derek Luh.
Canadian actor Elliot Page shares he is transgender (CBC News) , 2020
- “Page said he has been inspired by many in the trans community, and thanked them for their courage, generosity and working to make the world a more inclusive and compassionate place.
While Page said his joy is real, it is also "fragile." Despite feeling profoundly happy and acknowledging his privilege, he is also scared of the invasiveness, the hate, the jokes and the violence.”
- “Page said he has been inspired by many in the trans community, and thanked them for their courage, generosity and working to make the world a more inclusive and compassionate place.
Jorge Luis Borges – The Garden of Forking Paths (Original title: El jardín de senderos que se bifurcan" (1941)) , 1948
- “He was Governor of Yunnan and gave up temporal power to write a novel with more characters than there are in the Hung Lou Meng, and to create a maze in which all men would lose themselves. ”
Ursula K. Le Guin – The Left Hand of Darkness, 1969
- “He was so feminine in looks and manner that I once asked him how many children he had. He looked glum. He had never borne any. He had, however, sired four. It was one of the little jolts I was always getting. Cultural shock was nothing much compared to the biological shock I suffered as a human male among human beings who were, five-sixths of the time, hermaphroditic neuters.”
- “Seven years we were kemmerings, and had two sons. Being of his flesh born they had his name Foreth rem ir Osboth, and were reared in that Clanhearth. Three years ago he had gone to Orgny Fastness and he wore now the gold chain of a Celibate of the Foretellers. We had not seen each other those three years, yet seeing his face in the twilight under the arch of stone I felt the old habit of our love as if it had been broken yesterday, and knew the faithfulness in him that had sent him to share my ruin. And feeling that unavailing bond close on me anew, I was angry; for Ashe’s love had always forced me to act against my heart.”
Linsey Miller – Mask of Shadows, 2017 ; a genderfluid character who goes by he, she or they depending on what they’re wearing
Cavetown – This Is Home, 2015 ; Includes themes of aromanticism, being transgender.
- “Often I am upset that I cannot fall in love but I guess
This avoids the stress of falling out of it” - “Ooh... I'll cut my hair
Ooh... to make you stare
Ooh... I'll hide my chest
And I'll figure out a way to get us out of here” - “Get a load of this monster
He doesn't know how to communicate
His mind is in a different place
Will everybody please give him a little bit of space
Get a load of this train-wreck
Hishair's a mess and he doesn't know who he is yet
But little do we know, the stars
Welcome him with open arms”
- “Often I am upset that I cannot fall in love but I guess
The Spook School – Richard and Judy, 2015
- “You tell your son
That when he's older
You’ll take him out chasing girls ” - “He doesn’t understand
But he'll get there in the end
And the boys, the boys the boys, the boys
Will handle themselves”
- “You tell your son
Personal “it” (it/its)
"My pronouns are it/its", said Grembi. (Analog Horror: Grembi's Night Show) , ; Grembi is a non-human entity who uses it/its. It's creator has said that even if it was human, it'd still use it/it's. Also, Grembi is a canon pansexual, genderqueer and drag monarch.
Matt Braly – Amphibia, ; Darcy is referred to with a variety of pronouns, including it/its and they/them.
Beth Greenfield – Here’s why some LGBTQ youth are now embracing the nonbinary pronoun ‘it/its’ (Yahoo!Life) , 2021
- “Discussions around this aspect of “it/its” are ongoing on social media, with a recent TikTok user (Maeve.digital, below) responding to commenters who were too offended by the pronoun to ever use it. "It's ironic," it says, "because basically what you're saying is 'I want to respect you, therefore I'm not going to use the pronouns that you just told me to use.'”
- “It certainly plays a part in Rouke’s choosing the pronoun — as does being autistic, it explains — because choosing the pronoun is the “reclaiming of dehumanization and ‘otherness’ through the positive use of pronouns typically used in a derogatory manner by others.”
- “It recently tweeted about the topic.”
Patric Fallon – Arca Is the Artist of the Decade (Vice) , 2019
- “The Venezuela-born artist, who came out as non-binary in 2018 and uses the pronouns "she" and "it," has come to embody practically every positive thing that is synonymous with the 2010s.”
Bruce Coville – Aliens Ate My Homework, 1993 ; Initally the character is referred to as a "he" by the narrator; later, after it asks to - as an "it".
- ““Okay,” I said. “Just tell me what pronoun to use when I’m talking about him. Her. Uh, it. I mean . . . see what I mean?”
“It will do just fine,” said Tar Gibbons.
“What will do just fine?”
“It will,” he repeated.
“What will?”
“It. Refer to me as an it.”
“That seems pretty rude,” I said nervously.
“Not as rude as calling me a he or a she,” it said.” - “Before I could answer, or ask the Tar why it kept calling me “Young Rod Allbright,” Plink went scooting back in the other direction, carrying something that looked like the interstellar version of a monkey wrench.”
- ““Pet flap?” asked Tar Gibbons.
“It's a special little door that lets the dog go in and out on his own.”
“Very thoughtful,” said Tar Gibbons approvingly.
I decided not to tell it that Mom had installed the flap more for our convenience than for Bonehead's.”
- ““Okay,” I said. “Just tell me what pronoun to use when I’m talking about him. Her. Uh, it. I mean . . . see what I mean?”
Martha Wells – The Murderbot Diaries, 2017
- “On a distant planet, a team of scientists are conducting surface tests, shadowed by their Company-supplied 'droid -- a self-aware SecUnit that has hacked its own governor module, and refers to itself (though never out loud) as "Murderbot." Scornful of humans, all it really wants is to be left alone long enough to figure out who it is. ”
Ian McDonald – River of Gods, 2004 ; spelled "yt" in the book but otherwise used and pronounced the same way as personal "it"
- “A sudden lurch throws Tal from the bench seat. The phatphat bounces to a stop. Tal rearranges yts thermal scatter coat, tuts at the dust on yts silk pants, then notices the soldiers. Six of them phase out of rural night camouflage.”
What's the deal with pronouns?
Pronouns are those words that we use instead of calling someone by their name every time we mention them. Most people use “he/him” and “she/her”, so we automatically assume which one to call them based on someone's looks. But it's actually not that simple…
Gender is complicated. Some people “don't look like” their gender. Some prefer being called in a different way from what you'd assume. Some people don't fit into the boxes of “male” or “female” and prefer more neutral language.
This tool lets you share a link to your pronouns, with example sentences, so that you can show people how you like to be called.
Why does it matter? Because of simple human decency. You wouldn't call Ashley “Samantha” just because you like that name more or because “she looks like a Samantha to you”. Or even if she does have the name “Samantha” in her birth certificate but she absolutely hates it and prefers to use “Ashley”. And it's the exact same story with pronouns – if you don't want to be rude towards someone, please address them properly. The only difference is that we usually know names, but not pronouns. We introduce ourselves with a name, but not pronouns. Let's change that!