My pronouns are:

he/him or it/its or ae/aer

(Interchangeable forms: Normative “he/him” or Personal “it” or Neopronoun “ae” / “æ”)

Example usage in sentences:

  • I think he is very nice.
  • I met him recently.
  • Is this his dog?
  • He told me that the house is his.
  • He said he would rather do it himself.

Table:

SubjectObjectPossessive determinerPossessive pronounReflexive
he him his his himself

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Examples from cultural texts:

Normative “he/him” (he/him)

  • Eiichiro OdaNami shows her Loyalty to the Crew!, 2021

    • He's the king of pirates..
  • Kohei HorikoshiMy Hero Academia (Translator: Caleb Cook) , 2016 ; Chapter: "Shoto Todoroki: Origin"

    • That Midoriya kid kept prodding at him and got beaten because of it.
    • Wasn't his plan to just keep provoking him, though?
    • Gotta admire his vigor.
  • Scott CawthonFive Nights at Freddy's 2, 2014

    • In the game Five Nights at Freddy's 2, the character Mangle, also referred to as "The Mangle," canonically uses she/him pronouns. In Phone Guy's call on the third night, he says "I think the employees refer to him as just 'The Mangle. '"
    • Additionally, part of his description in Five Nights at Freddy's: Ultimate Custom Night, part of her description says "...once Mangle reaches the vent opening he will never leave. Use the vent-snare to prevent her from making it that far."
    • When the creator of the game, Scott Cawthon, was asked about Mangle's gender, he says that her gender is "Yes."
  • Eric KripkeGen V, 2023 ; Jordan Li is the main character of the series “Gen V”; they are a bigender person. Two actors appear in this role: London Thor and Derek Luh.

  • Canadian actor Elliot Page shares he is transgender (CBC News) , 2020

    • Page said he has been inspired by many in the trans community, and thanked them for their courage, generosity and working to make the world a more inclusive and compassionate place.
      While Page said his joy is real, it is also "fragile." Despite feeling profoundly happy and acknowledging his privilege, he is also scared of the invasiveness, the hate, the jokes and the violence.
  • Jorge Luis BorgesThe Garden of Forking Paths (Original title: El jardín de senderos que se bifurcan" (1941)) , 1948

    • He was Governor of Yunnan and gave up temporal power to write a novel with more characters than there are in the Hung Lou Meng, and to create a maze in which all men would lose themselves.
  • Ursula K. Le GuinThe Left Hand of Darkness, 1969

    • He was so feminine in looks and manner that I once asked him how many children he had. He looked glum. He had never borne any. He had, however, sired four. It was one of the little jolts I was always getting. Cultural shock was nothing much compared to the biological shock I suffered as a human male among human beings who were, five-sixths of the time, hermaphroditic neuters.
    • Seven years we were kemmerings, and had two sons. Being of his flesh born they had his name Foreth rem ir Osboth, and were reared in that Clanhearth. Three years ago he had gone to Orgny Fastness and he wore now the gold chain of a Celibate of the Foretellers. We had not seen each other those three years, yet seeing his face in the twilight under the arch of stone I felt the old habit of our love as if it had been broken yesterday, and knew the faithfulness in him that had sent him to share my ruin. And feeling that unavailing bond close on me anew, I was angry; for Ashe’s love had always forced me to act against my heart.
  • Linsey MillerMask of Shadows, 2017 ; a genderfluid character who goes by he, she or they depending on what they’re wearing

  • CavetownThis Is Home, 2015 ; Includes themes of aromanticism, being transgender.

    • Often I am upset that I cannot fall in love but I guess
      This avoids the stress of falling out of it
    • Ooh... I'll cut my hair
      Ooh... to make you stare
      Ooh... I'll hide my chest
      And I'll figure out a way to get us out of here
    • Get a load of this monster
      He doesn't know how to communicate
      His mind is in a different place
      Will everybody please give him a little bit of space
      Get a load of this train-wreck
      Hishair's a mess and he doesn't know who he is yet
      But little do we know, the stars
      Welcome him with open arms
  • The Spook SchoolRichard and Judy, 2015

    • You tell your son
      That when he's older
      You’ll take him out chasing girls
    • He doesn’t understand
      But he'll get there in the end
      And the boys, the boys the boys, the boys
      Will handle themselves

Personal “it” (it/its)

  • "My pronouns are it/its", said Grembi. (Analog Horror: Grembi's Night Show) , ; Grembi is a non-human entity who uses it/its. It's creator has said that even if it was human, it'd still use it/it's. Also, Grembi is a canon pansexual, genderqueer and drag monarch.

    • "My pronouns are it/its." (from it's rentry)
      "It's name is Mx. G, or Grembi. Nice person, y'know. Always helping someone out when they need. It's just... Weird sometimes. My friend once told me he saw it chasing my friend, ___"
  • Matt BralyAmphibia, ; Darcy is referred to with a variety of pronouns, including it/its and they/them.

  • Beth GreenfieldHere’s why some LGBTQ youth are now embracing the nonbinary pronoun ‘it/its’ (Yahoo!Life) , 2021

    • Discussions around this aspect of “it/its” are ongoing on social media, with a recent TikTok user (Maeve.digital, below) responding to commenters who were too offended by the pronoun to ever use it. "It's ironic," it says, "because basically what you're saying is 'I want to respect you, therefore I'm not going to use the pronouns that you just told me to use.'
    • It certainly plays a part in Rouke’s choosing the pronoun — as does being autistic, it explains — because choosing the pronoun is the “reclaiming of dehumanization and ‘otherness’ through the positive use of pronouns typically used in a derogatory manner by others.
    • It recently tweeted about the topic.
  • Patric FallonArca Is the Artist of the Decade (Vice) , 2019

    • The Venezuela-born artist, who came out as non-binary in 2018 and uses the pronouns "she" and "it," has come to embody practically every positive thing that is synonymous with the 2010s.
  • Bruce CovilleAliens Ate My Homework, 1993 ; Initally the character is referred to as a "he" by the narrator; later, after it asks to - as an "it".

    • “Okay,” I said. “Just tell me what pronoun to use when I’m talking about him. Her. Uh, it. I mean . . . see what I mean?”
      It will do just fine,” said Tar Gibbons.
      “What will do just fine?”
      It will,” he repeated.
      “What will?”
      It. Refer to me as an it.”
      “That seems pretty rude,” I said nervously.
      “Not as rude as calling me a he or a she,” it said.
    • Before I could answer, or ask the Tar why it kept calling me “Young Rod Allbright,” Plink went scooting back in the other direction, carrying something that looked like the interstellar version of a monkey wrench.
    • “Pet flap?” asked Tar Gibbons.
      “It's a special little door that lets the dog go in and out on his own.”
      “Very thoughtful,” said Tar Gibbons approvingly.
      I decided not to tell it that Mom had installed the flap more for our convenience than for Bonehead's.
  • Martha WellsThe Murderbot Diaries, 2017

    • On a distant planet, a team of scientists are conducting surface tests, shadowed by their Company-supplied 'droid -- a self-aware SecUnit that has hacked its own governor module, and refers to itself (though never out loud) as "Murderbot." Scornful of humans, all it really wants is to be left alone long enough to figure out who it is.
  • Ian McDonaldRiver of Gods, 2004 ; spelled "yt" in the book but otherwise used and pronounced the same way as personal "it"

    • A sudden lurch throws Tal from the bench seat. The phatphat bounces to a stop. Tal rearranges yts thermal scatter coat, tuts at the dust on yts silk pants, then notices the soldiers. Six of them phase out of rural night camouflage.

Neopronoun “ae” / “æ” (ae/aer)

  • Allison ForsythHow the Pandemic Upended the Life of Sarasota’s College Students (Sarasota Magazine) , 2021

    • Online classes were foreign to Krasny, save for a random driver’s ed course ae took in high school. During lockdown, ae was taking welding and sculpting classes that required special materials, which the school provided. But it was hard to replicate assignments alone in aer room. (Oceanna uses the pronouns “ae” and “aer”).
  • A City of Surveillance and Wonders: Announcing S. Qiouyi Lu’s Debut Novella In the Watchful City (Tor.com) , 2020 ; The article is about a book by S. Qiouyi Lu, who uses ae/they pronouns, titled "In the Watchful City." Anima, the protagonist of the book, uses æ/ær/ærs pronouns.

    • Tordotcom Publishing is thrilled to announce that Jonathan Strahan has acquired World English Rights to S. Qiouyi Lu’s In the Watchful City, a lyrical, intimate novella set in a remote, fantastical city that uses a complex living network to watch over its inhabitants and visitors. Through the lens of four interconnected stories, one of the city’s cloistered human overseers will see aer knowledge of aer world expand beyond the city’s boundaries to places—and possibilities—ae has never before imagined to exist.
    • S. Qiouyi Lu writes, translates, and edits between two coasts of the Pacific. Aer work has appeared in several award-winning venues. Ae edits the magazine Arsenika and runs microverses, a hub for tiny narratives. You can find out more about S. at aer website s.qiouyi.lu or on Twitter
    • sqiouyilu.
  • Bernardine EvaristoGirl, Woman, Other, 2019

    • they discussed the best gender-neutral alternatives such as ae, e, ey, per, they, and tested each word to see if the words tripped off the tongue or “tripped over it, ditto with the alternatives to his and hers: hirs, aers, eirs, pers, theirs and xyrs

  • David LindsayA Voyage to Arcturus, 1920

    • No children were produced by the act; the lover aerself was the eternal child. Further, ae sought like a man, but received like a woman.
    • Ae possessed broad shoulders and big bones, and was without female breasts, and so far ae resembled a man. But the bones were so flat and angular that aer flesh presented something of the character of a crystal, having plane surfaces in place of curves.
    • Maskull found it impossible to compute aer age. The frame appeared active, vigorous, and healthy, the skin was clear and glowing; the eyes were powerful and alert—ae might well be in early youth.
  • S. Qiouyi LuIn the Watchful City (GoodReads book summary) , 2021 ; This is the GoodReads summary of "In The Watchful City" by S. Qiouyi Lu. The main character is Anima and æ uses æ/ær/ærs pronouns. According to the reviews, other characters have neopronouns like se/ser/sers and e/em/eirs.

    • Anima is one of the cloistered extrasensory humans tasked with watching over Ora's citizens. Although ær world is restricted to what æ can see and experience through the Gleaming, Anima takes pride and comfort in keeping Ora safe from all harm.
    • As Anima’s world expands beyond the borders of Ora to places—and possibilities—æ never before imagined to exist, æ finds ærself asking a question that throws into doubt ær entire purpose: What good is a city if it can’t protect its people?

What's the deal with pronouns?

Pronouns are those words that we use instead of calling someone by their name every time we mention them. Most people use “he/him” and “she/her”, so we automatically assume which one to call them based on someone's looks. But it's actually not that simple…

Gender is complicated. Some people “don't look like” their gender. Some prefer being called in a different way from what you'd assume. Some people don't fit into the boxes of “male” or “female” and prefer more neutral language.

This tool lets you share a link to your pronouns, with example sentences, so that you can show people how you like to be called.

Why does it matter? Because of simple human decency. You wouldn't call Ashley “Samantha” just because you like that name more or because “she looks like a Samantha to you”. Or even if she does have the name “Samantha” in her birth certificate but she absolutely hates it and prefers to use “Ashley”. And it's the exact same story with pronouns – if you don't want to be rude towards someone, please address them properly. The only difference is that we usually know names, but not pronouns. We introduce ourselves with a name, but not pronouns. Let's change that!

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